Quote:
Originally Posted by Comicsartist
None. The right would filibuster without end why the lightbulb should not be changed. "The lighbulb is working!"
The left would argue that the lightbulb needs replaced, the lightbulb isn't working.
But nothing would get done. Alas, the lightbulb would stay unchanged.
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Or, if it is still emotionally convenient to think that our government earns its keep...
Depending which special interest group has preeminence, the begrudging bipartisan accord that a light bulb needed changing could result in the no-bid purchase of 600,000 light bulbs with taxpayer dollars and warehousing of same, also at taxpayer expense, in a facility owned by a campaign donor who would, like the purveyor of light bulbs, be free...because we are ALL ABOUT a free market...to charge whatever the hell he pleases.
An accident in said facility, since it was performing a public service by holding public goods, will oblige the government-read-that-taxpayer to compensate the campaign donor turned government contractor for his losses. Whew.
Sadly...but we understand that Shit Happens, we are a compassionate people...government-read-that-taxpayer inventory of Future Light, which was meant-note-the-good-intentions to lock in a price, albeit inflated, will instead be recorded as a loss. Happily, Congress will call a Special Session and will ram through urgent legislation authorizing funds for the immediate purchase of 600,000 replacement bulbs...light being key, as everyone knows, to national security.
While the new no-bid price is considerably higher, the taxpayers already have a relationship with the original light bulb supplier and that reassures us, despite appearances. We are also a loyal people...note our confidence in again warehousing our Future Light at the restored-at-taxpayer-expense facility of the campaign donor, also at a higher price, obviously, given his setback.
Too...things are always a lot more complicated than Quickdraw Magraw bloggers realize...the light bulb supplier is a relative of someone whose signature is key to another piece of legislation being promulgated for the public good...an alphabet agency devoted to the study and development of a largely misunderstood and increasingly important segment of the population, the Uber Rich After Neoconservative Uber Success (URANUS).
Because we are a people, and therefore a government, that is continually vigilant as to its impact on the environment, it IS possible that this type of Future Light will not be optimal in the future...in which case, pretty much rinse and repeat the above and either unload the inferior bulbs to an inferior country or, if it is deemed that doing so would negatively affect the campaign donor's prices, destroy them.
Should this scenario develop, the people can take heart not only in their environmental conscientiousness but in job growth as well, with addition of Light Bulb Destroyer to our economy. To our own payroll, it must be owned, but still, when you get right down to it, that's how we built America...one job at a time.
Let there be light.