He was a man of strength and integrity, a proud American and a true patriot. But out of all the reasons to hate Charlton Heston's guts, the one he will be most remembered for was his irrational support for the so-called "Second Amendment": an obscure passage in the Bill of Rights which he, in his Alzheimer's-ravaged mind, believed protected an individual's "Right to Bear Arms".
The truth is, no one really knows what the Second Amendment means. The meaning of the words "...the right of the people to keep and bear Arms shall not be infringed," has eluded even the best Constitutional scholars, from George Clooney to Rosie O'Donnell, for countless generations. Even the Supreme Court, a historically reliable bastion of progressive wisdom (albeit somewhat diminished since Bush began filling it with neocons and Uncle Toms), remains divided over the interpretation of the mysterious phrase.
The best theory anyone has for the existence of the Second Amendment is that the Founding Fathers were idiots and had no idea what they were getting us all into. Or maybe they just put the Right to Bear Arms in there as a joke. If so, then the joke is on the 12 million young people who die every year in campus shootings, thanks to Heston's twisted defense of an outdated right that has nothing to do with gay sex or abortions.
BlameBush!: We'll Go Ahead and Take That Gun Now, Chuck