Elliott

(Contd)

So why would a man like Takei -- a successful actor recognized around the world, living a happy life in L.A. with his partner of over 20 years -- willingly place himself (and frankly, his partner Brad, too) in this unpredictable and potentially dangerous line of fire? And how, many in the gay community wondered, could Takei possibly work with someone like Howard Stern? Would it be worth a backlash?
For Takei, the answer was yes. He had faith in Stern -- and in his intentions. "He strongly believes that people who love each other, care for each other, and take responsibility for each other who happen to be of the same gender are entitled to equal rights," Takei wrote on his blog after the announcement. "Howard Stern is a shock jock because truth naked can be shocking. Some of his humor can be adolescent. So what? We all could use a bit of adolescent giggle from time to time. It's good for us."
Takei did find himself having explain his decision to members of the gay community -- people, uniformly, who didn't listen to the show. "I had to get them to understand that decency comes in many shapes," he told Gay.com. "Some may look down on Howard because of something they've heard, or been told, about Howard, without really knowing who Howard is. He has the guts to stand up for what's right. He has guts. And it's important for people to know that Howard is a decent, fair-minded guy. He has me on the show, and he absolutely allows me to be who I am. In today's media, that really is remarkable."
And so began Takei's -- and Stern's -- unforeseen (and presumably unintentional) path to encouraging tolerance within what Takei refers to as the "large, truly decent and fair-minded Middle America" that is Stern's audience.
But this is, after all, the Stern Show -- and there were times where the gay jokes have pushed the envelope.
One early test of the boundaries of taste was a game in which George was asked to feel inside a cast member's uncircumcised pouch to identify the object hidden in it. (Quick note for those unfamiliar with the Stern Show: These antics go on regularly with straight cast members, even when Takei is not a guest. And I dare anyone to not be glued to the TV when watching this segment on Howard TV On Demand -- you can't look away. For the record, it was an AA battery.)
The other cast members refused, vocal in their disgust, but George was game, and approached it as any other challenge. But this time, it went too far: His boyfriend Brad took offense, and the fallout was significant.
But the most interesting part of the stunt was this: George and Brad's fight became the topic du jour, and the fact that the disagreement was over "Guess What's in Sal's Pouch" became secondary. Howard and his cohorts discussed George and Brad's disagreement as they would any couple's problems, sympathizing at having been in similar positions with their own partners when participating in "questionable" antics on the show. Make no mistake, there were plenty of gay jokes along the way -- but there was no disguising the fact that they considered George and Brad's relationship problems as valid as each other's.
"My husband has never understood my friendships with my gay friends," Stern listener Katherine Fallon told Gay.com. "But he's a huge Stern fan, and I can actually see a major shift in his tolerance toward gays with George always on the show and talking about Brad, and getting the respect of Howard and Artie."
This comes as no surprise to Takei. "I get e-mails from people all the time saying, 'you know, I'm a decent guy, I'm straight, male, married with children, but I'm all for equality,'" Takei told Gay.com. "I think Howard's contributed enormously to our being able to reach that large, decent, fair-minded Middle America."
While George's mere presence is clearly having a positive effect on listeners, his real work is done on a more individual level through his friendship with Artie Lange, one of Stern's famous on-air personalities. Lange is a hugely successful New Jersey comic/actor with a fanatical blue-collar fan base. He's also a self-proclaimed homophobe who doesn't bat an eye at dropping the word "happy person."
Lange is also very vocal in his distaste for some of the show's gayer stunts -- not because they're crass or homophobic, but because they're gay at all. He also doesn't seem to enjoy the fact that these stunts consistently pull in the highest ratings on Howard TV. The few times I've been offended by the use of the word "happy person" on the Stern Show always seem to be when Artie says it: Unlike the others, Artie's words sometimes have a ring of conviction, of true intolerance, maybe even of hate.
Yet, of all the cast members Takei could have taken up with, it's Artie he took under his wing. Their relationship has become one of the show's more fascinating developments. In what is still referred to as their first date, Lange and Takei went to the Guggenheim together one day, and they've been hanging out ever since. Takei even refers to Lange as his "Cuddly Muffin."
When you consider that this is the same guy who freaked out on the "Queer Eye" guys' visit just three years ago, it's clear that Artie's comfort level with interacting with a gay man has gone through the roof.
"I'm not sure what to think of Artie's behavior," says Mark of Mark's Friggin. "He may come off as a homophobe on the show, but he seems to genuinely like George. Maybe he's more tolerant than he wants us to believe. Maybe he's playing it up for his old friends from Union, New Jersey, who think he should be homophobic."
And that is what's at stake here for George. Recognizing the power of media to change a collective perspective, he has made it his personal mission to change the mind of one boozy, outspoken comic with legions of fans. By making Artie his special case, George insists that Artie (and Artie's fans, and the show's listeners) accept his sexuality.
It's an aggressive move, if you think about it. George is unapologetic, and will not let Artie off the hook for insensitive epithets or careless jokes. In doing so, he's proven himself an agent of change. He's either revealed Artie to be more open-minded than he generally acts, or he's broadened Artie's heretofore-narrow opinions. Either way, if we can accept that George's presence can make an impact on someone like Artie, we can extrapolate the impact he's having on millions of listeners who -- like Artie -- have probably never had a consistent gay presence in their lives.
Takei definitely feels an outpouring of support from his new fans. "A lot of Howard Stern's listeners have written me saying that they never really thought about the issue of gay rights before," he told TV Guide, "but that, after having heard me speak on it, they now support equality for gays and lesbians."
Whether you love Howard Stern or hate him, there is no denying his influence. And the mere fact that the most popular radio program of the past 20 years has a proud, out gay man sharing his life with a national and largely straight audience is something of a cultural watershed.
What Takei is doing is currently unrivaled in popular media, and he does so without reservation. But mostly, it's his ability to laugh at the absurd -- whether straight, gay or something else -- that endears him to the audience, and proves that not everything about being gay has to be politicized. Sometimes it's just about having a good time, and George Takei is having the time of his life.
[Editor's note: When Takei was told during our interview that Artie had had a huge fight with someone on the show this week and called that person a "spic happy person," Takei was extremely interested. "Well I hadn't heard that," he said. "I'm going to have to do a little homework and find out what happened with that -- because I'm going on the show next week, so this is good for me to know. See? My education with Artie is a continuing process, and that's an example of the work I have left to do!" George will be on the Stern Show this Monday, December 3rd.]
As written about several times here on Gay.com, Howard Stern is one of the most gay-friendly celebs anywhere, but is Shane from "The L Word" his lesbian kryptonite?
Howard (along with his on-air crew, Robin, Fred, Gary and Artie) spent close to half an hour on Tuesday's show discussing Stern's fiance Beth's crush on Shane from "The L Word."
As always on the show, the discussion was hilarious, insightful and downright fascinating. Beth's crush on a girl seemed bothersome to Howard, and the fact that the crush seemed to be getting more and more intense a mere two weeks after the couple announced their wedding engagement seemed to make him even more insecure.
Given Howard's decades-old on-air fixation with lesbians, the extent of his genuine insecurity over his fiance's lesbian crush may seem shocking. But longtime listeners know that Stern has made it clear time and time again that, unlike most men, he would panic in a threesome out of fear the two women would fall in love and forget about him.
"Beth has some sort of weird thing for this chick on 'The L Word,' Shane," he complained. "You know, sometimes at night we watch separate TV shows in separate rooms, and every time I go in, she's watching that Shane."
Show producer Gary Dell'Abate chimed in, saying he watches "The L Word," too, but not for Shane. "No, I like the chick Shane is fucking on the show," he clarified. "But not only does Shane fuck every woman she sees, she can turn a straight chick gay."
After pulling up photos of actress Kate Moennig on the Internet and commenting on her beauty, Howard got Beth on the phone.
Howard: Honey. I'm trying to get to the bottom of this . . . Shane thing.
Beth: [Flustered] Oh, my God. I'm blushing.
Howard: Why? I don't understand this?
Beth: All of these years you have asked me if I was into girls, and if I was into girls, what would be my type, right? It would be that.
Howard: Do you do any fantasizing about Shane?
Beth: I don't fantasize about her, but I have to say that when I watch that show, I . . . I fixate on her scenes. Especially her sex scenes. I love watching them.
Already clearly bothered, Howard gets even more upset after his sidekick Robin gushes over the Internet images of Moennig -- and Beth gushes in agreement.
Robin: Oh, my God! Look at the arms on this girl!
Howard: Wait, wait, wait. You're not helping, Robin.
Robin: I know; I just wanted to see what Beth is looking at!
Howard: What do you mean "the arms on her?"
Robin: I just mean that I just pulled up "The L Word" site and I'm looking at Kate and she's got the most muscular arms. . .
Howard: Like a dude?
Beth: Yeah, she looks like a dude, but she's so cool and I find her so . . . beautiful.
Things get more interesting as the crew tries to learn more about Moennig's personal life and to dissect the sexual aspect of the crush. (Note: We'll address Beth's answer to Howard's very interesting question about the difference between her "non-sexual" crush on Gwyneth Paltrow vs. her "sexual" crush on Shane in another article...)
Robin's theory is that Beth would never go through with actually having sex with a woman.
"The moment a straight woman starts to fantasize about that person, she will realize it's another woman and it cuts everything off," she said. Robin then hypothesized that there was a male aspect of the Shane character that really excited Beth.
Beth agreed. She also said that when she did an Internet search for Kate (a fact that made Howard panic and the crew howl) and saw photos of Kate in a dress, it turned her off. She said when she read that Kate was straight in real life and had a boyfriend, that also turned her off.
After determining that the crush was actually on the character of Shane, rather than the actress Kate, talk turned to getting Kate the actress onto the show -- at Beth's request. Howard said he'd only book Kate on the show if Beth came into the studio that day, and then added, "Are you going to, like, leave me or something?"
By the end of the segment, Beth was trying to console Howard and told him not to be jealous of Shane. "I'm not jealous," he said rather sadly. "I just want to understand it, and I don't, that's all."
In many ways, this is another breakthrough moment in broadcasting -- not just for Howard Stern but for the gay community as well. It is the first time we can recall that a major celebrity figure has publicly considered the possibility of his/her partner's own homosexual fantasy or leanings. And what makes it so intriguing is that the catalyst for this is an ambiguous, dark, monosyllabic lesbian -- not some silicone-inflated, bisexual porn star.
Obviously Shane isn't real, but Beth's (and who knows how many other straight girls') attraction to her is real, as is everything that Shane represents. Furthermore, Kate is real, so Howard -- in his own manic and obsessive personality -- can't just write this off. We only hope that Kate agrees to go to the studio so that this topic can be explored and that maybe she can help Howard understand it all.
As reported here a few months back, the famed radio personality is proving very gay friendly these past few years. On Stern's Sirius Satellite radio broadcast today, he took on basketball star Tim Hardaway's shocking anti-gay statements in classic Stern fashion.
"Tim Hardaway's got to be the dumbest guy in basketball, I mean, you just don't go around and say this kind of shit. What is he, fucking nuts? He doesn't know what's going on in the world?"
Later, after playing the full audio of Hardaway's shocking diatribe - which included his saying," I don't like gay people and I don't like to be around gay people. I am homophobic. I don't like it. It shouldn't be in the world or in the United States" - Stern had had enough.
"Oh really? Well guess what, now they won't be around you," Stern said. "He's a fucking asshole, I'll say that. Imagine when he's going to some club in Miami and he goes to get a drink and some gay guy is helping him. Or if he has to go to a clothing store. I mean, I hope he's shunned by gays, I really do. Gays should be like, "Oh you're the guy who doesn't want gays in the world? Yeah, go get your own drink, fuckface. "
We've always loved Martha Stewart for her control freakiness which -- let's face it -- is downright drag diva-esque. But after her recent appearance on Howard Stern's Sirius Satellite radio show, we now adore her: It was arguably the most entertaining, honest, sexy and absolutely fascinating interviews of her -- and his -- career.
Stewart visited Stern to promote the one-year anniversary of her own Sirius Satellite show, and the seemingly opposite pair got along so well during their 40-minute talk that, by interview's end, each promised to have the other over for dinner.
Stewart answered every question Stern dared to ask, with a candor and sassy sense of humor she's rarely shown. Naturally, quite a few of Stern's questions revolved around her sex life -- and Stewart was more than game to reply.
While she never had lesbian sex in prison, Stewart admitted she saw many beautiful women there -- and that she'd witnessed several female inmates involved in sexual relations. Well, sort of. "So you never saw two girls getting it on in front of you?" asked Stern. "Oh yes," replied Stewart. "Not naked girls, but I saw them in the dark. They had trysts behind the buildings and the doorways."
According to Martha, the butch women liked her the most.
"Some girls that looked like boys were actually the ones who would come on to me," Stewart said.
"If they asked me for lunch and they were interesting, I would have lunch with them. There were girls with mustaches, and there were girls with beards. And they shaved ... I would be walking down the little road outside the prison [and I'd ask myself] 'How'd that boy get in here?' when it was actually a girl."
And "doing lunch" is definitely the right phrase. When asked how these women would hit on her, Stewart said they always wanted to talk shop. "First they'd ask about business, because they all had business plans. Some of the women who were there for 10, 20 years, they had developed business plans. They'd taken business courses in the prison."
Stern also tried to get Stewart to admit to saying she masturbated while in prison, but she didn't take the bait. "You know what? Five months is a short time," she shot back -- but then told Stern she had sex the day after her release. "My boyfriend picked me up [from prison], he took me home, he was very ... you know." "And then you immediately jumped him?" asked Stern. "No, he jumped me," laughed Stewart.
Stewart also revealed she was a big fan of the Thumper vibrator, raving about the $1,200 version because of its wide variety of heads. (She never admitted to using it sexually, claiming the "wonderful tool" is great for basic massaging.)
As for her dating life, Stewart said that even though she's in a relationship, she's always open to going on dates with interesting men -- but said she rarely gets asked out.
Then she hit Stern with another fascinating revelation, going into great detail about why she had to stop dating Sir Anthony Hopkins.
"Oh, I loved him," she said. "But he was scary. I was going to invite him up to Maine because I have a beautiful house. But then I revisited, because I saw that movie 'Hannibal' again. I just couldn't get past the Hannibal Lecter thing: 'Do you want me to eat your brain while I'm sitting in your beautiful dining room?'" (Stern shared a similar story about getting hit on by Linda Blair, but he couldn't get past "The Exorcist" thing.)
And the spicy stories kept coming: When asked about plastic surgery (she hasn't had any), she brought up her breasts. "My boobs got bigger, and I hate it. I hate it," she said. "I was nice and flat-chested for a long time and then, you know." (Howard incorrectly guessed she was a D-cup. She's a C.)
Stewart was flinging zingers even as she left the studio. When Stern told Stewart not to wear panties next time she came in, she calmly informed him she gone "commando" during the entire interview. "No, I have no underwear on," she said, and then flung out her devastating exit line, "And I find bras restricting."

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