chrisbb

Free Dr Pepper for entire USA if Guns N Roses releases album


by Elizabeth Bromstein
Can Dr Pepper motivate Axl to finish his album, 17 years in the making?


On Wednesday a CNN headline announced "Dr Pepper Will Give Everyone in America a Free Soda If Axl Rose Releases New Guns N' Roses Album, Chinese Democracy, In 2008". (former Guns guitarists Slash and Buckethead, however, will not be eligible for free soda)

According to CNN "Tired of a world in which Americans idolize wannabe singers and musicals about high schoolers pass as rock 'n roll music, Dr Pepper is encouraging (ok, begging) Axl Rose to finally release his 17-year-in-the-making belabored masterpiece, Chinese Democracy, in 2008."

And so they have promised free soda to everyone but Slash and Buckethead if the album ships this year.

Jaxie Alt, director of marketing for Dr Pepper said, "It took a little patience to perfect Dr Pepper's special mix of 23 ingredients, which our fans have come to know and love, so we completely understand and empathize with Axl's quest for perfection -- for something more than the average album. We know once it's released, people will refer to it as "Dr Pepper for the ears" because it will be such a refreshing blend of rich, bold sounds -- an instant classic."

OK, the odds of this actually happening are pretty slim and what do we care right? Nobody said anything about Canadians getting free soda. But this is a great idea. I love the brand identification. Dr. Pepper sales will probably go through the roof over the next few weeks.

And if it gets us any closer to hearing Chinese Democracy, I am so all over it. Though alas, I think Axl is all too painfully aware that unless this record turns out to be anything short of a masterpiece on par with the Mona Lisa or the Sistine Chapel, reviewers are gonna eat him for breakfast. And since there's little chance it will be such a masterpiece, no matter how great it is, there's no way he can avoid this fate.

Still. It'll be a breakfast of champions. With a side order of refreshing Dr. Pepper.

Free Dr Pepper for entire USA if Guns N Roses releases album : News & Features : Music : Sympatico / MSN

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chrisbb

this is bloody brilliant, though i hate the shitty commercial side of it. dammit, i want him to release the album. we need real music, no more americal idol shit

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Free Parking

This thread should have a poll.

"Which will be released first: Chinese Democracy or Duke Nukem Forever?"

AlineaHeart

How about we just release Axl in Canada so they can keep him?

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Have Fun! :-)

poetrychic

that won't work unless you put up a fence to keep him there

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"it was a creed written into the founding documents that declared the destiny of a nation, yes we can!"

Sean

Nah, he's so skinny he'll slip through the cracks.

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grumpygirl

Don't forget to send Axl's plastic surgeon with him so he won't have to come back for touch ups.

PursuitOfHappinessParty

Fancy, schmancy thread for a Nazareth wannabe knock-off

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It rubs the lotion on its skin, or else it gets the hose again.

Malkavian

Chinese Democracy of course. I've been waiting for Duke Nukem Forever since i've been a wee toddler.

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chrisbb

derailed my own thread by adding a poll

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