Welcome To Menopause - Page 4

Dianekkdi · 01-04-2008, 09:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by gonzo

Hey, don't knock hysterectomies! At freaking 50 I went doctor ro doctor until I found one that would give me one. (The big female C runs rampant in my family, and I grew polyps like kudzu.)

It was the best move I ever made. Omg, I had a total, and I don't miss *any* of it!

I'll be 50 the day before your birthday this year.

Happy early birthday to us.

And, you are not the first person to tell me that an hysterectomy was the best thing you could have done for yourself. My sister, an OB nurse, suggested it immediately. I don't knock them. I just don't want one for myself unless it is necessary. Right now, I don't have the time; I don't have the health insurance; I don't like hospitals or doctors or surgery. I don't like any of that stuff.

I received my hormone screening results. I am getting my first prescription of Bio-identicals filled. They cost me $112.00. If they work and get me back on an even keel--I'll be one happy camper. Right now I think it's the best choice of action for me.

Dianekkdi · 01-21-2008, 07:22 PM

Menopause is when you don't know whether or not to wake up in the middle of the night to the night sweats or the cold chills that follow.

Menopause - Symptoms & Solutions

Dianekkdi · 03-03-2008, 05:23 PM

So much for bio-identicals....

My body thought it would try and bleed out on Tuesday into Wednesday. I was at my doctor's by Wednesday afternoon.

He gave me two cc's of progesterone in oil and a 5mg prescription of progesterone (Aygestin) to see if we can't get the bleeding under control before resorting to a DNC.

Yeesh...

Yesterday, it seemed looming...today I'm thinking that vaginal bleed out experimentation thing might be over....

At this point, I think, if I had health insurance--I'd go for the hysterectomy and just take it out.

I hate being in the pharmaceutical food chain.

anhailla · 03-03-2008, 06:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dianekkdi

So much for bio-identicals....

My body thought it would try and bleed out on Tuesday into Wednesday. I was at my doctor's by Wednesday afternoon.

He gave me two cc's of progesterone in oil and a 5mg prescription of progesterone (Aygestin) to see if we can't get the bleeding under control before resorting to a DNC.

Yeesh...

Yesterday, it seemed looming...today I'm thinking that vaginal bleed out experimentation thing might be over....

At this point, I think, if I had health insurance--I'd go for the hysterectomy and just take it out.

I hate being in the pharmaceutical food chain.

you will get better..hang in there

anhailla · 03-03-2008, 06:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by disfigured

I'll tolerate a lot, but I've heard horror stories and I won't stand for that.

ahhh

wow.

Dianekkdi · 03-08-2008, 07:56 PM

You know you've gotten used to Geritol Liquid Tonic when you can take a swig straight from the bottle, hold it in your mouth for two, three seconds, then throw it down your throat like a nice clean shot of good Scotch.

Kanadesaga · 03-10-2008, 05:14 AM

Refuge51 · 03-14-2008, 07:29 AM

This was so hilarious I just have to put it here for those who are still having Aunt Flo visit even if it is less often

Dear Mr. Thatcher,

I have been a loyal user of your 'Always' maxi pads for over 20 years and I appreciate many of their features. Why, without the LeakGuard Core or Dri-Weave absorbency, I'd probably never go horseback riding or salsa dancing, and I'd certainly steer clear of running up and down the beach in tight, white shorts. But my favorite feature has to be your revolutionary Flexi-Wings. Kudos on being the only company smart enough to realize how crucial it is that maxi pads be aerodynamic. I can't tell you how safe and secure I feel each month knowing there's a little F-16 in my pants.

Have you ever had a menstrual period, Mr. Thatcher? Ever suffered from the curse'? I'm guessing you haven't. Well, my time of the month is starting right now. As I type, I can already feel hormonal forces violently surging through my body. Just a few minutes from now, my body will adjust and I'll be transformed into what my husband likes to call 'an inbred hillbilly with knife skills.' Isn't the human body amazing?

As Brand Manager in the Feminine-Hygiene Division, you've no doubt seen quite a bit of research on what exactly happens during your customer's monthly visits from 'Aunt Flo'. Therefore, you must know about the bloating, puffiness, and cramping we endure, and about our intense mood swings, crying jags, and out-of-control behavior. You surely realize it's a tough time for most women. In fact, only last week, my friend Jennifer fought the violent urge to shove her boyfriend's testicles into a George Foreman Grill just because he told her he thought Grey's Anatomy was written by drunken chimps. Crazy!

The point is, sir, you of all people must realize that America is just crawling with homicidal maniacs in Capri pants ... which brings me to the reason for my letter. Last month, while in the throes of cramping so painful I wanted to reach inside my body and yank out my uterus, I opened an Always maxi-pad, and there, printed on the adhesive backing, were these words: 'Have a Happy Period.'

Are you f------ kidding me? What I mean is, does any part of your tiny middle-manager brain really think happiness - actual smiling, laughing happiness, is possible during a menstrual period? Did anything mentioned above sound the least bit pleasurable? Well, did it, James? FYI, unless you're some kind of sick S&M freak, there will never be anything 'happy' about a day in which you have to jack yourself up on Motrin and Kahlua and lock yourself in your house just so you don't march down to the local Walgreen's armed with a hunting rifle and a sketchy plan to end your life in a blaze of glory.

For the love of God, pull your head out, man! If you have to slap a moronic message on a maxi pad, wouldn't it make more sense to say something that's actually pertinent, like 'Put down the Hammer' or 'Vehicular Manslaughter is Wrong', or are you just picking on us?

Sir, please inform your Accounting Department that, effective immediately, there will be an $8 drop in monthly profits, for I have chosen to take my maxi-pad business elsewhere. And though I will certainly miss your Flex-Wings, I will not for one minute miss your brand of condescending bullshit. And that's a promise I will keep.

Always. .. .

Best,
Wendi Aarons
Austin , TX

Cookie · 03-14-2008, 07:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Refuge51

This was so hilarious I just have to put it here for those who are still having Aunt Flo visit even if it is less often

Dear Mr. Thatcher,

I have been a loyal user of your 'Always' maxi pads for over 20 years and I appreciate many of their features. Why, without the LeakGuard Core or Dri-Weave absorbency, I'd probably never go horseback riding or salsa dancing, and I'd certainly steer clear of running up and down the beach in tight, white shorts. But my favorite feature has to be your revolutionary Flexi-Wings. Kudos on being the only company smart enough to realize how crucial it is that maxi pads be aerodynamic. I can't tell you how safe and secure I feel each month knowing there's a little F-16 in my pants.

Have you ever had a menstrual period, Mr. Thatcher? Ever suffered from the curse'? I'm guessing you haven't. Well, my time of the month is starting right now. As I type, I can already feel hormonal forces violently surging through my body. Just a few minutes from now, my body will adjust and I'll be transformed into what my husband likes to call 'an inbred hillbilly with knife skills.' Isn't the human body amazing?

As Brand Manager in the Feminine-Hygiene Division, you've no doubt seen quite a bit of research on what exactly happens during your customer's monthly visits from 'Aunt Flo'. Therefore, you must know about the bloating, puffiness, and cramping we endure, and about our intense mood swings, crying jags, and out-of-control behavior. You surely realize it's a tough time for most women. In fact, only last week, my friend Jennifer fought the violent urge to shove her boyfriend's testicles into a George Foreman Grill just because he told her he thought Grey's Anatomy was written by drunken chimps. Crazy!

The point is, sir, you of all people must realize that America is just crawling with homicidal maniacs in Capri pants ... which brings me to the reason for my letter. Last month, while in the throes of cramping so painful I wanted to reach inside my body and yank out my uterus, I opened an Always maxi-pad, and there, printed on the adhesive backing, were these words: 'Have a Happy Period.'

Are you f------ kidding me? What I mean is, does any part of your tiny middle-manager brain really think happiness - actual smiling, laughing happiness, is possible during a menstrual period? Did anything mentioned above sound the least bit pleasurable? Well, did it, James? FYI, unless you're some kind of sick S&M freak, there will never be anything 'happy' about a day in which you have to jack yourself up on Motrin and Kahlua and lock yourself in your house just so you don't march down to the local Walgreen's armed with a hunting rifle and a sketchy plan to end your life in a blaze of glory.

For the love of God, pull your head out, man! If you have to slap a moronic message on a maxi pad, wouldn't it make more sense to say something that's actually pertinent, like 'Put down the Hammer' or 'Vehicular Manslaughter is Wrong', or are you just picking on us?

Sir, please inform your Accounting Department that, effective immediately, there will be an $8 drop in monthly profits, for I have chosen to take my maxi-pad business elsewhere. And though I will certainly miss your Flex-Wings, I will not for one minute miss your brand of condescending bullshit. And that's a promise I will keep.

Always. .. .

Best,
Wendi Aarons
Austin , TX

Too funny Ref!

Refuge51 · 03-14-2008, 08:10 AM

I received it in an email this morning and couldn't stop laughing

01-21-2008, 07:22 PM	#32 (permalink)
Dianekkdi Truth, Justice & ... Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: A place between yesterday and tomorrow Posts: 738 My Mood: Blog Entries: 7 Thanks: 10 Thanked 43 Times in 28 Posts	Menopause is when you don't know whether or not to wake up in the middle of the night to the night sweats or the cold chills that follow. Menopause - Symptoms & Solutions __________________ ---------------------- Reinvestigate 9/11 Impeach......Prosecute......Imprison "...The force of public opinion cannot be resisted when permitted freely to be expressed...." --Thomas Jefferson
	Top

03-03-2008, 05:23 PM	#33 (permalink)
Dianekkdi Truth, Justice & ... Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: A place between yesterday and tomorrow Posts: 738 My Mood: Blog Entries: 7 Thanks: 10 Thanked 43 Times in 28 Posts	So much for bio-identicals.... My body thought it would try and bleed out on Tuesday into Wednesday. I was at my doctor's by Wednesday afternoon. He gave me two cc's of progesterone in oil and a 5mg prescription of progesterone (Aygestin) to see if we can't get the bleeding under control before resorting to a DNC. Yeesh... Yesterday, it seemed looming...today I'm thinking that vaginal bleed out experimentation thing might be over.... At this point, I think, if I had health insurance--I'd go for the hysterectomy and just take it out. I hate being in the pharmaceutical food chain. __________________ ---------------------- Reinvestigate 9/11 Impeach......Prosecute......Imprison "...The force of public opinion cannot be resisted when permitted freely to be expressed...." --Thomas Jefferson Last edited by Dianekkdi; 03-03-2008 at 05:29 PM.
	Top

03-08-2008, 07:56 PM	#36 (permalink)
Dianekkdi Truth, Justice & ... Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: A place between yesterday and tomorrow Posts: 738 My Mood: Blog Entries: 7 Thanks: 10 Thanked 43 Times in 28 Posts	You know you've gotten used to Geritol Liquid Tonic when you can take a swig straight from the bottle, hold it in your mouth for two, three seconds, then throw it down your throat like a nice clean shot of good Scotch. __________________ ---------------------- Reinvestigate 9/11 Impeach......Prosecute......Imprison "...The force of public opinion cannot be resisted when permitted freely to be expressed...." --Thomas Jefferson
	Top

03-10-2008, 05:14 AM	#37 (permalink)
Kanadesaga Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: NYS - Devil's country Posts: 7,080 My Mood: Blog Entries: 6 Thanks: 232 Thanked 93 Times in 67 Posts	God have mercy __________________ Bill has the Blues Saturdays 10 pm to Midnight est www.whws.fm Thanksgiving Show 9pm to 1 am
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03-14-2008, 07:29 AM	#38 (permalink)
Refuge51 animal lover Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Around Here Posts: 1,892 My Mood: Thanks: 115 Thanked 52 Times in 33 Posts	This was so hilarious I just have to put it here for those who are still having Aunt Flo visit even if it is less often Dear Mr. Thatcher, I have been a loyal user of your 'Always' maxi pads for over 20 years and I appreciate many of their features. Why, without the LeakGuard Core or Dri-Weave absorbency, I'd probably never go horseback riding or salsa dancing, and I'd certainly steer clear of running up and down the beach in tight, white shorts. But my favorite feature has to be your revolutionary Flexi-Wings. Kudos on being the only company smart enough to realize how crucial it is that maxi pads be aerodynamic. I can't tell you how safe and secure I feel each month knowing there's a little F-16 in my pants. Have you ever had a menstrual period, Mr. Thatcher? Ever suffered from the curse'? I'm guessing you haven't. Well, my time of the month is starting right now. As I type, I can already feel hormonal forces violently surging through my body. Just a few minutes from now, my body will adjust and I'll be transformed into what my husband likes to call 'an inbred hillbilly with knife skills.' Isn't the human body amazing? As Brand Manager in the Feminine-Hygiene Division, you've no doubt seen quite a bit of research on what exactly happens during your customer's monthly visits from 'Aunt Flo'. Therefore, you must know about the bloating, puffiness, and cramping we endure, and about our intense mood swings, crying jags, and out-of-control behavior. You surely realize it's a tough time for most women. In fact, only last week, my friend Jennifer fought the violent urge to shove her boyfriend's testicles into a George Foreman Grill just because he told her he thought Grey's Anatomy was written by drunken chimps. Crazy! The point is, sir, you of all people must realize that America is just crawling with homicidal maniacs in Capri pants ... which brings me to the reason for my letter. Last month, while in the throes of cramping so painful I wanted to reach inside my body and yank out my uterus, I opened an Always maxi-pad, and there, printed on the adhesive backing, were these words: 'Have a Happy Period.' Are you f------ kidding me? What I mean is, does any part of your tiny middle-manager brain really think happiness - actual smiling, laughing happiness, is possible during a menstrual period? Did anything mentioned above sound the least bit pleasurable? Well, did it, James? FYI, unless you're some kind of sick S&M freak, there will never be anything 'happy' about a day in which you have to jack yourself up on Motrin and Kahlua and lock yourself in your house just so you don't march down to the local Walgreen's armed with a hunting rifle and a sketchy plan to end your life in a blaze of glory. For the love of God, pull your head out, man! If you have to slap a moronic message on a maxi pad, wouldn't it make more sense to say something that's actually pertinent, like 'Put down the Hammer' or 'Vehicular Manslaughter is Wrong', or are you just picking on us? Sir, please inform your Accounting Department that, effective immediately, there will be an $8 drop in monthly profits, for I have chosen to take my maxi-pad business elsewhere. And though I will certainly miss your Flex-Wings, I will not for one minute miss your brand of condescending bullshit. And that's a promise I will keep. Always. .. . Best, Wendi Aarons Austin , TX
	Top

03-14-2008, 08:10 AM	#40 (permalink)
Refuge51 animal lover Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Around Here Posts: 1,892 My Mood: Thanks: 115 Thanked 52 Times in 33 Posts	I received it in an email this morning and couldn't stop laughing
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